Putting Boys on the Ledge

Blueberry "Blue" Waller, whose parents are kind of crunch granola people who named her after a fruit (yet her siblings are Theo and Marissa, and we are never told why they get the normal names) is determined to follow the lead of her friends: put boys on the ledge.

In other words, shelve them if you don't like them, and if you do, keep room on the shelf, just in case:

Instead of you feeling all bad about yourself because a boy blows you off, you're supposed to somehow get him to fall madly in love with you, and then you can ignore him, and then he gets all bummed and goes out onto The Ledge. 

And if you like a boy and he likes you, you always have to keep him teetering close to The Ledge so he never treats you badly. As long as you're holding The Ledge over his head, you're in control. 

In Stephie Davis' Putting Boys on the Ledge, this theory is put to test when Blue meets an exceptionally hot boy named - are you ready - Heath Cavendish while trying out for a play. How can you put pure hotness on the ledge?

Well, it might be a little easier if you've got Colin Bradshaw, hired to help Blue's family with their myriad of animals. Colin is cute, sweet and pretty awesome in his own right.

Putting Boys on the Ledge is a fluffy little bit of fun. There isn't much substance to it, and you kind of know - okay, you totally know - where things will head. But Stephie Davis makes it a fun ride, and you find yourself entertained by Blue and her friends.

I imagine 14-year-old girls everywhere will eat this book up.



Published by Smooch and available at Amazon.com and bookstores everywhere.
Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC.

The Summer My Life Began

In Shannon Greenland's The Summer My Life Began, Elizabeth Margaret is presented with an intriguing offer. Her heretofore unknown aunt, Tilly, invites her to spend the summer between graduating from high school and heading to Harvard with her at her bed and breakfast in the Outer Banks, North Carolina. Turns out, Elizabeth Margaret's mother and grandmother have concealed Aunt Tilly's existence from "Em", as Elizabeth Margaret's beloved younger sister, Gwenny, calls her. But why?

So Em heads to North Carolina, where she meets "sexy loser" Cade, a young man who works for her aunt. She also meets a cousin, Frederick, she did not know about, along with a quirky chef named Domino and a houeskeeper named Beth. Within a few weeks, Em goes on dates with two different men, uncovers the family mystery, and admits - out loud - that she does not want to go to Harvard, but instead dreams of culinary school.

And there you have it. That, faithful readers, is the sum total of this book.

I wanted to like it, I really did. I wanted to like Em more than I did, and I wanted to care more about her. But instead, I was frustratingly disinterested. Her life is too perfect. Rich girl, valedictorian, gets into Harvard, finds out her parents have lied to her about something important, but with preternatural aplomb, gets over the lie pretty darn quickly. She breaks up with one guy, but stays friends with him. Everyone loves her. She's perfect.

TOO perfect.

There is no real conflict here. We all know that she'll give up Harvard and go to culinary school. We all know she'll get together with Cade. We all know that she'll muddle through the family trauma and come out just hunky dory.

Here is what would make this a better read:

1. Explain why Em is so agreeable to her parents' wishes for her future. All we get is a "I don't like to make waves" vibe from Em, but why? What does she get out of it?
2. Have her struggle some, for goodness sakes! The most we get is a page or two of angst over the family mystery. It's all too neatly solved. There is no mystery.
3. Explain what, exactly, happens the night she stays with Cade. Don't be coy. Did she sleep with him? I know this is a YA novel, but don't play these games.

If you're looking for a mild, moderately entertaining, lightweight book, then The Summer My Life Began is right up your May pole. But if you want some conflict, drama and mystery, then search elsewhere.

Published by Penguin. Available for Kindle pre-order on Amazon. 

Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC!

Irresistible Forces

I've been on a Hot Romance Novel tear of late. I think I need a Harlan Coben mystery or something to break the trend.

I actually read Irresistible Forces, by Brenda Jackson, about a month or so ago. It is nothing if not an extremely Hot Romance Novel.

Taylor Steele (gotta love that name) is a successful professional woman who has decided that her career is not all she wants in her life. She wants a baby. And in typical take-charge fashion, she knows who she wants to father her baby: Dominic Saxon (another great Hot Romance Novel name). Dominic is rich, powerful and gorgeous, and he doesn't appear to need a lot of convincing. Is it that he wants to make a baby with Taylor, or is it that he wants a week of - and I quote - "Hot sex. Heated sex. Never-ending Sex."

Turns out, he's up for both. And when I say, "Up," I think you know what I mean. Wink wink.

Here is a glimpse into Dominic's mind:

He knew what she would bring to the bedroom - that was a given. Sitting across from her, inhaling her scent while visions of all the things they would be doing together on that island ran through his mind was playing havoc with certain body parts. She was fully dressed now, but he could see her naked while he made love to her, day in and day out. She was temptation at its finest and the thought that he wouldn't have to resist temptation for an entire week had his body throbbing.

 Irresistible Forces basically is headboard rocking sex with a little plot thrown in, every now and then. Of course there are obstacles to Taylor and Dominic's True Love (whatever), but when you read this book, you're reading it for the headboard rocking, not the hand wringing. And the sex scenes are good. The rest of it is kind of silly.

Read it for the sex.

Wicked Weekend

If you're like me - and God help you if you are - the letters BDSM don't quite ring a bell. But upon further examination, you might make out this: bondage, discipline, sado-masochism.

Yep.

When I began reading Wicked Weekend, by Gillian Archer, I realized I was way out of my depth. I've never heard of BDSM, knew nothing about it, and really am not interested in it. But that does not mean that Wicked Weekend is not an entertaining, if slight, novel.

Lauren miserably attends her sister's pre-wedding ski party (who knew you could ski close to Las Vegas?), pining over her sister's fiance, over whom Lauren nurses a bad crush. To get away from the happy couple for a few minutes, she goes to the bar to buy a drink. While there, she sees a gorgeous man across the room and recognizes the black bandana peeking out of his back pocket. She knows enough about the BDSM culture to tell that this man is into BDSM and prefers to be the dominant person in the fun. He sees her looking at him, approaches her, and the next thing you know, she's upstairs in his room, getting spanked. Literally. Before they engage in their festivities, however, Jamie, the spanker, defends Lauren to her snotty sister, which sets the tone for a possible romance.

Oh, come on. You know there will be romance. This is a Hot Romance Novel, after all.

But that's where it feels slight. While the sexy times are interesting and quite hot, the romance does not have any heft to it at all. Lauren is impressionable and slightly buttoned up, but I can see why she would fall for Jamie. The problem is why he falls for her. His choice of her over other women is not made clear. He has trust issues, but why Lauren? And really, now that I think about it, why does she decide she wants to date him?

It's almost as if Gillian Archer can't decide if she's writing a bondage tale or a Hot Romance Novel. It's almost as if she cannot do both, unless she provides more information. Still ... it's hot. The headboard rocking is HOT.

Here is a brief glimpse:

She could do this. God, he looked so hot sitting there with that smug grin on his face. She could tell that he was getting off on her torment. Truth be told, so was she. Release hovered just out of reach. And she knew the only way she as coming was if she followed his directions exactly and let him control her body.

Hot, right? Wicked Weekend has a lot of hotness.

And who knows? Maybe you'll have a hankering for a spanking.

Her Dark Protector

What happens when you have a former oxycodone-addicted prosector who needs protection from a hardened widower-turned-member of an underground organization of justice avengers?

Hotness.

Her Dark Protector, by Carol Stephenson, is a tense, page turning read, chock full of bad guy thugs, bad guy thugs masquerading as good guys, two sad back stories, and some good old headboard rockin'.

Gail Malloy is a prosecutor set up, apparently, by a crime lord she has been trying to get arrested for murder. Unbeknownst to her, for six months, Jason Hawke (gotta love that last name, as in "watch you like a ..."), a member of the Justice Alliance, has watched her, determined to protect her from the bad guys. You'll have to read to find out why and what happens next. The story is interesting and will keep you reading, which is what you hope a Hot Romance Novel is.

You also hope for some passion and sex, and Her Dark Protector has both. Jason gets hard within minutes of touching Gail the first time:

"Listen to me." He shifted, bringing their bodies closer so that the tension - or was it excitement? - flowing through him also raced through her.

Or was the almost palpable electricity coming from her? Her adrenaline rush had channeled into a deep, gnawing need.

And she wasn't the only one affected by the physical contact, not if her rescuer's erection was any indication. She held still. 

Hello! He has blood flow the first time he grabs her arm? What will happen when they lock lips? Oh, faithful readers, never you fear. Jason Hawke knows how to please a woman.

I finished this book over the course of two days of sporadic reading. It is a fairly slim tome, but it is fun to read and the sex scenes are appropriately hot. Much like Gail, I wouldn't mind having more.

A Kiss in the Wind

Pirates! Lusty wenches! Pillaged silver! Oh, my!

A Kiss in the Wind, by Jennifer Bray-Weber, is a fine example of an enjoyable Hot Romance Novel. Marisol Castellan belongs to a sort of band of thieves, and after one auspicious theft, she runs into Blade Tyburn (now, if that name doesn't scream Hot Romance Novel Hero, what on earth would). Sparks fly. Tempers flare. Pulses race. Skirts are lifted. Shirts removed. Headboards rocked.

There is, however, a plot that keeps the passion rolling. Marisol and Blade both want to find a missing ship, him because he wants its silver cargo and her because she wants to find her missing brother. All the while, the two tackle their raging desire for one another.

An early passage, taking place shortly after they meet. Blade has just caressed her cheek:

Another ripple of desire spread through her. He rubbed his thumb across her lips and, for a moment, she thought her legs might liquefy under her. She parted her lips and closed her eyes. In the inviting fog of his erotic gesture, she slipped, letting the tip of her tongue lightly wet his thumb. He smiled and nodded once. "Yes, you would be a most pleasing attraction to hasten my return."

 These two clearly are meant for each other, although at varying junctures, each is convinced the other has betrayed them. The sex scenes are hot. Marisol is a curvaceous woman, and it's nice to see that Blade appreciates her voluptuousness. She, in turn, likes his hind end and his dimples.

A Kiss in the Wind is a fun, romantic read. There are twists and turns to keep you reading, and the sexy times are nicely disbursed.

Girl Unmoored

Holy cannoli.

This book made me cry, faithful readers. I actually wept - more than once!

Girl Unmoored, by Jennifer Gooch Hummer, is a lovely little book that I quite highly recommend. 

The story is set during a summer in mid-80s Maine, as Apron Bramhall (yes, that is her name, and, no, it is not a nickname) struggles to deal with her mother's recent death. The nurse who tended her mother, Margie, whom Apron refers to as M, has moved into Apron's house and, apparently, into Apron's father's heart. As if Apron isn't upset enough about her father's budding romance, M wants to kill Apron's guinea pig, The Boss (named after my spiritual fiancé, Bruce Springsteen, and, no, that's not the only reason I like this book). What Apron (or 'Aprons,' as M calls her) needs is a best friend; alas, Rennie, the person who should fill that slot, has dumped Apron for someone with more social cachet. 

Apron befriends Mike, whom she first encountered when he played the titular role in Jesus Christ, Superstar. Mike and his partner, Chad, run a florist shop, and as Apron's friendship with them grows, she begins working for them occasionally. This being the mid-80s, Mike and Chad's relationship is not embraced by the locals, and Chad is ill. I'll let you figure out from what.

There are some heartbreaking scenes, but some that make you laugh out loud as well. To whit:

When I got to Scent Appeal, the door was open but the lights were off. Usually this meant Mike had gone out to get more flowers or something for Chad. Mike said today would be a busy one. We'd probably have to stay open late because people would be running in at the last minute to buy flowers for their Fourth of July parties, and if that happened, don't worry, he'd drive me home. Mike had even bought a bag of tiny American flags, which I stuck into all the vases yesterday even though Chad said he'd rather have his fingernails peeled off than celebrate Reagan's crusty right-winged America. The real Boss was mad at Reagan, too, for singing "Born in the USA" without permission. The story was on the cover of my dad's newspaper. Even when Bruce Springsteen looks mad, he's still a fox.

Apron's voice rings true to a girl between 7th and 8th grade, and her sadness, frustration and isolation do as well. Aside from her name - it's not even an interesting gimmick - she's utterly captivating. I wanted to hug her.

Please pick up Girl Unmoored. You will thank me later.